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July 23, 2015

If it makes a man happy to imagine he is a grilled cheese sandwich, is it compassionate to support and encourage his delusion? Is it more loving to seek to persuade him of his error or to find him a companion who thinks he’s a bag of potato chips?

If a man has experienced such childhood trauma that he can only find comfort and refuge in life by dreaming he is a piece of toast, is he best understood and happiness in life found for him by agreeing that, for him, life is better as a piece toast? Does compassion try to lead him into healthy, normal relationships with others or just spread jelly on him?

If a daughter decides she is really a unicorn trapped in a girl’s body, what is the loving parental response? Do the parents go all out to build her the best stable possible and give full support to her lovely new unicorn lifestyle? Do loving parents cover her with horse hide and strap a horn onto her forehead? Is it healthiest for her life if her parents buy her horseshoes or put her in front of a mirror and show her she is not a unicorn, no matter what she may feel?

If identity is really a state of mind and of personal feelings, why is any expression of personal identity off limits? If a boy is a girl because he feels like it, if a girl has no gender because she identifies with none and if a white person is black because she feels like it, why can a boy not be a wolverine because he feels like it? If biological construction is not a sufficient parameter for identifying personal identity, what is?


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